Once Upon a Time

In a Kingdom not far from here....

Once upon a time, in a kingdom not far from here, there lived an amazing woman. She had a fulfilling career, a supportive partner, and a loving family. Her windows sparkled with cleanliness in the sunlight and her outfits were always impeccable. She was friendly with everyone she met and was always patient with her children. It was rumored throughout the kingdom that she exercised every single day, and…this always amazed the listeners….she only ate healthy foods!

She had time for volunteer work and hobbies. She took amazing photos of vacations and parties and her hair always (seriously, always) looked good.

She took care of her aging parents and also had time to cook…every night! She was well read and could discuss any topic with comfort and ease.

People were in awe of her and wanted so much to be like her. They tried to imitate everything she did, but it was impossible.

This made them feel very bad about themselves.

People did not understand why they could not do it all and be just like her…or even close.

Each night, the women of the kingdom would go over and over everything they could have done better…..done differently if only….if only…

And then one day, they heard the truth. The truth was that she was a figment of everyone’s imagination.

She wasn’t real!

How could this be? They turned to each other, saying, “but she looked”…and “I thought”…and, “didn’t you think it was true?” They were so upset, so disappointed, but then, more than a few of them felt relieved.

The person they were comparing themselves to, simply did not exist.

We view someone’s outside and compare it to our insides.

We compare what they show us to what we dare not show anyone.

We imagine their lives as perfect and we feel that our lives will never measure up.

And when we think this, that there are people who know how to do everything and have their lives in perfect balance, we end up with miserable feelings of inadequacy.

But here is the thing. No one has a perfect life. Everyone has insecure moments. All people feel sad sometimes and may cry more often than you think. Everyone gets tired, screws up, and feels upset about life at some point.

So here is the moral of the story. Since you can’t do it all, stop trying.

Once you acknowledge that you aren’t superhuman, that you can’t do it all, you can relax. Relax, take a breath, and then think.

What do I REALLY want to do? If I can’t do everything, then I should do things that matter the most to me.

If you can let go of the desire and those frustrating attempts to be everything

to everyone, every minute of every day,

you can start on a path of wonderful self discovery, balance and contentment.

What is important to you? It may be different than what is important to everyone else, or it may be similar….but it is what is important in your life.

I truly believe that we are meant to live healthy and happy lives. This does not negate the fact that very serious things can happen and do happen in our lives. But if we continue to believe that happiness is our right, we will move forward in powerful ways.

Life has ups and downs. Some days are better than others, and some times are more difficult than other times. If you want to feel good, if you want some balance, you need to stop doing some of the things you are trying to pack into your life.

I like this saying: “You can do anything you want, but you can’t do everything you want.” And I like to add, “at the same time.”

Think about what you spend your time doing and make some choices.

If you are saying that your health is important, then why are you going without sleep? If you are saying family is important, why do you insist on being on every committee? If you want to exercise, why are you making it a big deal? Go for a ten-minute walk everyday.

There are not enough hours in each day to address all our needs and wants, unless you are very fortunate and have tons of help and money. Use the hours you have been given to do what is the most important to you.

Take responsibility for the decisions you make each day.

Take responsibility for the way you treat your body and your health.

Take responsibility for your life.

You are the expert in your life.

Own it, and get balanced one minute and one choice at a time.

And let’s all live happily ever after.

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